If you like swear words + music with swear words, then you’ll love this short song by Laurent Paquin! It’s only 39 seconds long, but it’s full of sacres québécois (québécois swear words). Thanks to Jude for pointing me to it.
Chant sacré
Laurent Paquin (site officiel)
Ostie d’crisse de tabarnak
Ostie d’câlisse de viarge
(bis)
Ostie d’calvaire, ostie d’ciboire
Câlisse de tabarnak
Ostie d’crisse de tabarnak
Ostie d’câlisse de viarge
(bis)
Ostie d’câlisse de sacrament
Ciboire de saint Ostie
Ostie d’crisse de tabarnak
Ostie d’câlisse de viarge
(bis)
Ostie d’crisse de tabarnak
Ostie d’câlisse de viarge
_ _ _
sacres québécois
ostie = fuck
crisse = fuck
tabarnak = fuck
câlisse = fuck
viarge = fuck
calvaire = fuck
ciboire = fuck
sacrament = fuck
saint Ostie = Saint Fuck
I love it! It even has appropriate call and response structure! 😀
I just knew you’d love it! 😉
The “Saint fuck” is a _particularly_ nice touch! Just needs somebody doing the feet on the verses to achieve perfection. 😀
(Amusingly, this is not actually the first Quebec French song I’ve come across that features swearing–Les Tireux d’Roches have got a song on their latest album that, if my VERY rough read of the lyrics is any sign, is a song all about various excuses to swear!)
It’d be fun to see where those words come from and their translation. Now I have that tune stuck in my head!! LOL
Here you go! 🙂
swear word => French word it comes from (English equivalent in parentheses)
ostie => hostie (host)
crisse => Christ (Christ)
tabarnak => tabernacle (tabernacle)
câlisse => calice (chalice)
viarge => vierge (virgin)
calvaire (calvary)
ciboire (ciborium)
sacrament => sacrement (sacrament)
Yeah quebec has issues with religion. Culmunating in Duplessis tenure as prime minister. Closest thing to a tyrant we ever “elected”
Ostie d’crisse de tabarnak
The host of Christ of the tabernacle
Ostie d’câlisse de viarge
The host of the chalice of the Virgin
(bis)
Ostie d’calvaire, ostie d’ciboire
Host of Calvary, host of the ciborium
Câlisse de tabarnak
Chalice of the tabernacle
Ostie d’crisse de tabarnak
The host of Christ of the tabernacle
Ostie d’câlisse de viarge
The host of the chalice of the Virgin
(bis)
Ostie d’câlisse de sacrament
The host of the chalice of the sacrament
Ciboire de saint Ostie
Ciborium of the holy Host
Ostie d’crisse de tabarnak
The host of Christ of the tabernacle
Ostie d’câlisse de viarge
The host of the chalice of the Virgin
(bis)
Ostie d’crisse de tabarnak
The host of Christ of the tabernacle
Ostie d’câlisse de viarge
The host of the chalice of the VIrgin
(bis)
(*See? All perfectly innocent words and sentiments. Not one thing to even suggest the slightest bit of vulgarity. So we now turn our books to page 66 and together we chant Hymne Nr…. oops… )
In fact they are Homonimy of what you explain… Christ = Crisse… nothing to see but sound the same, Tabernacle = Tabarnak… Nothing to see again… Calisse = Câlisse, Note the accent on the A, again nothing to see… Catholic Church has opressed French Canadian as Slave and Reprodctive work force for lonnnnnng time… Maybe is it the only good thing that came out of it, our way to swear by Homonimy, sound the same, but it’s not the same…. Sorry for my english, i’m Quebecer Osti de câlisse.
Hope I don’t offend anyone by asking this (I don’t mean to), but … Is it possible to speak Quebecois French without sacres or fuck? Only saying because I rarely swear in English and only in French while watching Habs games and something goes wrong. 🙂 Is it a generational thing (the way it is English) where younger people swear a lot? I have FB friends who can compose entire an status with nothing but sacres …
It’s a cultural difference, not a generational one. Anglophones are more hesitant to swear than francophones. There’s a more liberal attitude towards swearing in Québec. Or that’s how I see it, at any rate.
Yes, of course it’s possible to speak Québécois French without swearing! It’s not necessary for you to swear. You’ll have to get used to hearing it though. 😉
Because, we have been under Catholic Church too long, and this is why, compare to the States, we have a dying faith, cause we really dislike catholic church and religion… (Not everybody, but a vast majority)
It IS possible to speak Québécois French without swearing? Really? I heard rumours to that, but I never thought is was true! (Felix! You’ve done it again! I’ve learnt something new and now I can’t wait to try it! Imagine: a conversation, in Québécois French and not one word of swearing! Tabarouette!) (OK… close. 😉 )
I just said that so I wouldn’t scare anybody off. It’s crissement impossible to speak Québécois French without swearing, but shhhhh…, we won’t tell.
It is possible for sure.. But not easy to have, better luck with the french from france and even there…. Bordel de putain de merde…. They verse in the human degradation and vulgarity far more offending by moment than ou way to swear in Quebec.
(I just laughed my lunch all over the table… Câline de binne de Calistirine!) (And other such melodious jurons.)
I learned basic Quebecois from a crazy Quebecois Eddie “Metal” Pomerleau while I was working for Club Med on Eleuthra Island, Bahamas.
Eddie taught me that “Ostie” was the sacrament, the jesus cracker you get from the pedophile/priest.
“Tabarnak” is the church itself, or the small house where the wine and crackers are kept near the pulpit,
“Callise” is the cup for the wine, or the Wholly (made up) Grail.
I’m American, but I love these words, all swear words in general.
I use these words quite frequently, even though most people don’t understand them, but when someone does, its usually a French Canadian, and they always get a kick out of it and say that they never expected to hear those words outside of Quebec, much less in the states. I usually say them in my best Eddie Quebecois, which is still pretty good after all these years.
I had a France Frenchie hear me say something with these words and he was very confused. It seems these are old French words and are only used in the French speaking parts of Canada, where, apparently, the French that is spoken there is considered antiquated (the Frenchies at Club Med didn’t seem to like the French Canadians very much, didn’t like to listen to them talk)
{Club Med was very discriminatory as far as a persons country of origin, the French were the highest paid (1300 or so monthly in 1993), Americans next at 700… I don’t remember them all, but those from Mexico only got around 300 per month and the Pacific Islanders (Philippines mostly, didn’t meet anyone from elsewhere in east Asia) around 200, per month}. It was a rude awakening when I learned of this system, so I went about verifying it, and everyone I asked did verify this. Long term Club Med employees (trust fund babies, nobody else could afford to work for so little) verified this also. It was well known amongst veteran G.O.’s that Club Med definitely played favorites with the French citizens, everyone else was looked down upon. There were no international laws to keep them from doing as they pleased with their money.
After I learned all I could about this, I was pissed and wanted out. If I quit, I had to pay my plane fare home, so I got a little mischievous. My mischief culminated in getting thoroughly polluted at the New Years party and telling each of the managers exactly what I thought of them and their shitty company. I didn’t get any reaction from any of them, so I had to resort to higher levels of mischief. After I got the desserts I wanted, I tossed the 6 foot long dessert table, fully stocked and decorated, into the pool. It was fucking glorious.
The next morning, after I stopped seeing stars, I was summoned to the chief of the villages’ office, where he offered me a couple of days off to get calmed down. I didn’t go thru all this to keep working here, so I laid into him for something, I don’t remember what. 3 hours later I was packed and ready to go. They gave me my plane ticket home and I was gone.
What was the question?