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Posts Tagged ‘tabarnak’

If you like swear words + music with swear words, then you’ll love this short song by Laurent Paquin! It’s only 39 seconds long, but it’s full of sacres québécois (québécois swear words). Thanks to Jude for pointing me to it.

Chant sacré
Laurent Paquin (site officiel)

Ostie d’crisse de tabarnak
Ostie d’câlisse de viarge
(bis)

Ostie d’calvaire, ostie d’ciboire
Câlisse de tabarnak

Ostie d’crisse de tabarnak
Ostie d’câlisse de viarge
(bis)

Ostie d’câlisse de sacrament
Ciboire de saint Ostie

Ostie d’crisse de tabarnak
Ostie d’câlisse de viarge
(bis)

Ostie d’crisse de tabarnak
Ostie d’câlisse de viarge

_ _ _

Sacres québécois

sacres québécois

ostie = fuck
crisse = fuck
tabarnak = fuck
câlisse = fuck
viarge = fuck
calvaire = fuck
ciboire = fuck
sacrament = fuck
saint Ostie = Saint Fuck

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Décâlisse, tabarnak!

Décâlisse, tabarnak!

I witnessed an argument over an iPhone in a public place in Montréal yesterday where some colourful language was used…

A man in his 30s walked past a table where a man in his 60s was sitting. The older man was looking at his iPhone.

The younger man stopped about three metres away from the table where the older man was sitting and began to observe him intently. The older man didn’t like this, and he asked the younger man what exactly he was looking at.

That’s when the younger man explained that he had lost his iPhone in the area, and wanted to know if the iPhone the older man was using was really his own.

The older man got angry at the suggestion that he was using a lost or stolen phone. He then swore at the younger man telling him to get lost:

Décâlisse!
Go the fuck away!

The younger man asked if he could see the phone, and the older man swore at him again:

Décâlisse, tabarnak!
Go the fuck away, goddammit!

The younger man kept looking at the phone from where he was standing. He seemed pretty convinced that it might be his. He then challenged the older man by saying:

Tu viens avec moi. Tu veux parler fort? On va parler fort dehors.
You come with me. You wanna shout? We can go shout outside.

The older man just told the younger man where to go again:

DÉCÂLISSE!!!

The younger man then moved about seven metres away from the older man, wondering what he should do. After about a minute, he finally walked right up to the older man to take a really good look at the phone. After he looked, he backed off and said:

OK, c’est pas le mien. Tu vois? C’est pas compliqué. Je m’excuse.
OK, it’s not mine. You see? It’s not complicated. I’m sorry.

I don’t know who’s more to blame in this altercation!

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Unless you’ve got the eyes of a fucking hawk, click to see a larger version.

These 5 ads, seen near the entrance to a gym in Montréal, take a bold approach at encouraging us to tighten up our unsightly arses.

The ads use language like tabarnak, ostie, je m’en câlisse and fuck.

To shield sensitive eyes from vulgarity in French, the offensive bits have been smeared with a layer of blood-stained blubber syphoned out of a desperate gym member.

Je m’en câlisse des excuses!
Fuck off with the excuses already!
(I don’t give a fuck about the excuses!)

Ostie que ça fait du bien!
Fuck that feels good!

Bouge ton gros cul!
Move your fat ass!

Fuck le temps supplémentaire, je m’entraîne!
Fuck the overtime, I’m gonna work out!

Tabarnak que je suis hot!
Fuck I’m hot!

(Ads from Club Athlétique Mansfield)

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In a scene from the television series 19-2, we see police officer Berrof and his teenaged son get into a violent argument in a Montréal street.

The teenaged boy walks ahead in the street ignoring his father. From behind, trying to get his son to listen to him, the father starts yelling j’te parle! (I’m talking to you!).

His son doesn’t want to talk, and he lets his father know this by telling him ça m’tente pas! (I don’t wanna [talk]!).

As the tension rises between the two, the father starts yelling at his son things like change de ton! (don’t talk to me like that!) and j’te parle, tabarnak! (I’m talking to you, goddammit!).

His son finally cracks and yells va chier! (fuck off!) at his father.

Seasons 1 and 2 of 19-2 are currently available on tou.tv.

[Language from 19-2, season 2, episode 2, Radio-Canada, Montréal, 4 February 2013.]

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OK, parfait. Là, je veux savoir, avant de commencer, y’en a-tu qui ont déjà essayé du Viagra? Qui par applaudissements a déjà pris du Viagra? Y’a-tu… OK, y’a une personne qui applaudit, un peu gênée. Moi, j’en ai pris, j’en ai pris du Viagra. J’ai pas honte de t’ça. J’ai essayé ça pis moi, regarde, j’savais pas que j’avais des problèmes d’érection avant d’essayer le Viagra. Mais là j’ai réalisé, j’avais jamais bandé de toute ma vie.

C’était fou, avec le Viagra, c’était fou… comme… ostie… mon pénis shakait! Mon pénis était fâché! Y était… Y voulait tuer tout l’monde. J’avais neuf pouces de graine, j’avais six pouces de peau. Ça voulait arracher… ça… mon pénis était Hulk Hogan qui déchire son t-shirt, ostie. J’ai encore les vergetures. Ç’a, ç’a vraiment… Pis je l’ai pas dit, je l’ai pas dit à ma blonde quand j’ai essayé ça, t’sais, parce que… [elle] était pas là, c’est pas d’ses câlisse d’affaires, t’sais! Non, non, mais… [elle] était là.

T’sais, l’annonce qui dit, si l’érection dure plus que quatre heures, consultez votre médecin. Pis là, j’étais comme, tabarnak, j’sus au Québec, j’en ai pas d’médecin! T’sais, pis… Imagine, j’appelle Urgences Santé, je peux pas appeler Urgences-santé dire : « Oui, salut, c’est Mike Ward. Eille! j’sus vraiment bandé! » C’est sûr que ça passe aux nouvelles. Fait qu’là…

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